I decided to travel alone to get some perspective. For a couple of years I have been a victim of obsession, where I am either consumed by someone's thoughts or have constantly been haunted by thoughts , memories and presence of another. This journey was about breaking this pattern to be able to look at life and art in a new life. I have hardly spoken anything the entire day , unless it is a necessity to speak . I am sure most people who know me would be ecstatic to hear that . Just realized something about myself that only when I am truly restless on the surface do I find calm within. The past few days have been that of silence and the smallest unsettled situations have made me snap. It has almost been impossible to cut off from the world. Emotions manage to seep in and take its dominant place where ever you go . You can leave a place but somewhere you have truly left only when the place has left you .
I have not slept for four days straight. just work and concentration. Subjecting myself to focus on one situation making it my ultimate choice. I have children and flower-peckers for company. Has this solitary confinement helped ? My body is not the same anymore , it clearly does not like experiments such as these and rebels like never before. Recovery from this torturous venture will take a while . Meanwhile I want to sleep without excruciating pain haunting my body ...
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